Everyday Insanity and Delight

New Year's noodle-heads....

New Year's Eve.  Hmm, some years I'm busting to party, others I really can't be bothered.  This year I couldn't be bothered until friends suggested we just hang out for dinner and a few drinks together.  So that's what we did.  Easy night, takeaway pizza in our backyard, probably for the last time ever as we are moving house in a month!

Mmm yep, our backyard has hosted some cool memories over the past almost ten years.  I'm feeling a bit sentimental actually but I'm saving that for a post I'm not writing in my pyjamas at 1 in the afternoon. Oops.

Truth is about these pics though is my friends all tell me to go away when the camera comes out but I think they secretly like it. Please, why would I NOT take photos and besides, it's me that they come to when they need a pic for something so I've decided all the protests are pretend and when I insist on a stupid pic with each of them, they comply.  Eventually.

It was nice.  It was hot.  I drank too may Cosmopolitans, and stupidly I think it was because I was actually thirsty.  They didn't mix well with cream off the pavlova later that night but the good thing was that the feeling it gave me stopped me drinking and hence saved me a feral hangover! 

Kids all played nicely, nothing was too trashed and so another year begins....

Pussycat pussycat where HAVE you been.....?

Well I've not been to London visiting any Queens I can tell you.  I've been wanting to pop back in here but the longer I was away, the larger the task seemed.  Anyway I'm at the point now where if I'm not going to blog, I may as well save myself the fees and delete it.  Silly thing is though, I love my blog and sharing stuff makes me accountable for what I say, whatever that is....

So the giveaway?  Hmm my fault for being so disorganised, no-one won coz I left it way too late to claim and ugh, it's just another thing I've neglected this year and I'm going to explain part of the reason why.  2011 has not been all kind to me but it hasn't all been bad. 

For example, I had the most amazing wedding season this year kicking off with this wedding here of course and following with these.  I could clog up the internet with images from these amazing, joy-filled and beautiful weddings but I have my Facebook page for that :) Instead here's an overview....

One of these gorgeous weddings was in Tasmania, in Launceston to be precise.  I met the couple on Facebook and amazingly they met on Facebook too and it was surreal yet spectacular to meet them in real life and shoot their wedding.  The bonus of this was that I got a trip to Tassie, and I'd never been there before :)

I missed my family but oh how lovely it was to be away.  Alone. :D

As well as weddings I was shooting babies, families, engagements, grandparents, you name it, I've been photographing it ;)

Around Easter though, I started feeling like things were getting on top of me, like I wasn't "right".  Only my work was keeping me joyful and normal, but I was also getting overwhelmed with the sheer enormity of my workload and lack of ability to concentrate.  I knew things weren't right especially when I wasn't keeping up with my Design Team committments to Aussie Scrap Source.  Despite my best intentions, I just lost the ability to scrap well and just couldn't pinpoint why so I resigned.

I assumed I was feeling so "off" because I was so busy.  I was actually incredibly distracted by nasty thoughts about myself and started losing my confidence in everything I did from scrapping, to photographing, parenting, you name it, I was pretty convinced I was completely crap at it.  Despite the amazingly happy feedback I received from my clients, I was completely convinced that everything I did was hopeless.  I stopped paying bills, just couldn't keep up with our budget, my house became a mess and we were completely disorganised.  I started to work out why but was not willing to give into it.

It was that black-dog-bitch.  Depression, or more accurately in my case - PTSD. I knew she was coming back to haunt me in all her gloomy nastiness but I was convinced it wasn't going to beat me.  I mean, how could it?  I'm now a volunteer speaker for Road Trauma Support Services. I talk about my stuff all the time and I'm FINE right?  I ignored my flashbacks, my nightmares etc.  I accepted my hypervigilence as being a caring mother and figured that I was tense because I wasn't doing enough yoga.  Sigh.  If I just got more sleep and got on top of my workload I'd be perfectly fine right.  WRONG.

In short around May, I had a nervous breakdown of sorts.  A complete, maybe my worst, PTSD regression ever.  Whilst denying it was coming back, I worked as the photographer for Fatality Free Friday which meant I was photographing ambassador Bev Brock,  race car driver Mark Winterbottom and Police Deputy Commissioner Kieran Walshe.  The day was well received and I met some beautiful people and I thought that having the courage to face it all meant I was on the mend.

I mean really....do I look stressed?

I was feeling pretty ace to be in the middle of the city contributing to a couse that I feel SO passionate about.  I was stoked.  For a while.  Truth is that after I finished, I had one of the worst panic and anxiety attacks of my life.  I literally had to stop at a servo on the way home where I was frozen, unable to get back into my car because I was terrified of getting back on the road.  I kept telling myself I was fine and in control.  I love my car, I'm okay.  But my legs WOULD NOT MOVE.

I eventually got home tired and shaky and ready to "get over it" but that attack scared me so I asked my GP to up my anti-depressant dose as it wasn't working as well.  I'd been on Lexapro for over three years as it cleared the "fog" that I get and helped with nightmares etc.  I'd be fine after that right? Of course! Heck I even did a police press conference for the Queen's Birthday long weekend telling Australia about my accident in front of media from every major news group in the state.....and I was FINE.

Local people recognized me which was a little awkward I guess but they were all so kind.  In fact everyone was so kind from the media, to police, to anyone and everyone.  It was um...surreal.

This meant I was good right? Err no.

I made it through the birthdays of both of my babies with Alex turning 12 (eh am I THAT old?) and Madeleine turning nine.

I didn't really feel present at either of their birthdays but i did my best because I was determined to stomp on that black dog bitch.  It didn't work.  It overwhelmed me and my full-on nightmares and flashbacks returned with a vengeance.  My whole household has suffered and I was close to suicidal.  I knew I had to do SOMETHING for the sake of my family if nothing else.  I just wanted to lay down and let it consume me so it would end.  Please.

My GP was my saviour and thankfully so were my kids.  Knowing that they need me well has been the main motivation for my continued need to fight.  Without them I'd have given up by now. I was referred to a specialist trauma psychologist who then referred me to a psychiatrist.  Yep a psychiatrist OMG.  Only CRAZY people need psychiatrists right? Ugh so humiliating but it's been good.

He moved me to Pristiq, a different kind of anti-depressant.  To be honest the change has been SHIT.  I've felt like it's doing NOTHING but I'm on quite a high dose now and little by little I feel like I'm coming back.  I've even ventured out with the family to the Aquarium in Melbourne a little while ago.  Felt like a total space cadet but no-one needed to know I guess....

It was really hard to stay present but again, my kids have forced me to make the effort just by their being.

I'm not doing any more talks for a while, and just staying focussed on protecting me and getting well.

My psychologist has helped me uncover so many things about me that I didn't know and it's been interesting.  It's not been pleasant but it's been cathartic.  We haven't started on the intense work yet as I have to be emotionally stable.  I'm working on it.  She encouraged me to delve back into creating art so Nathan and I worked to create me a designated art space.

It's just mine.  My space.  My desk and workspace have just been in our lounge in a shared space but this, this little corner is MINE.  So far I've created these...

Which led me to finding the courage to exhibit.  It may only be in a show organised by the TAC but it's in the divine Geelong Gallery and it's a non-threatening start.  I feel like I'm "home" when I paint or draw and I can express things through art that I can't through words. 

The exhibition opening was the perfect excuse for time in Geelong too.  I don't get there now that both of my grandparents have passed but it's one of my favourite places in the world.  It's filled with many of my happiest memories from being a small child until now.  I feel at peace in Geelong and it was just what I needed.  I took Madeleine with me and we had a girl's night starting with the exhibition opening and then staying in a multi storey hotel.  I've never seen her so excited and she just kept hugging me and saying thankyou!   So cute and a reminder of what's important.

It was also an amazing experience to see my work in a "real" gallery again after not being in one for almost 20 years and also to listen quietly to what people said.  My piece had the desired effect if what I overheard people say is anything to go by.  Viewers can vote on their favourites and pieces are for sale, all there until September 4th.  I don't expect to win a prize but hey, it'd be nice :)

The day after the exhibition opening, I was able to take Maddy to the Fairy Park in Anakie.  I was really unwell with a stupid flu-virus and feeling spacey from my anti-D drugs but we still had a lovely time :)

We took the super-duper long way home and went on a bit of an adventure, fabric shopping and just enjoying the one-on-one time together. 

I can't wait for my dissociation to be resolved.  I had no idea the way I felt had a NAME, let alone WHY I feel this way.  I do now and know that it's peaking as it did this weekend away.  It's the pits.  Really.  At least I know why I always feel like I don't belong and feel spacey.  It sucks and I had no idea it is a PTSD symptom.  I just thought I was vague :-S  It's hard to enjoy anything, I just get all kind of quiet - bah!

There is good news now, I'm feeling like my cylinders are starting to re-fire.  I feel like I'm over the hump - well some of it anyway.  I feel motivated to continue to create art and capture amazing memories for people. I even have some work on display at Tea-Lite in Warragul, the hippest little nook to relax in EVER!!!

I have something else on the burner too but I'm not teaching scrapbooking anymore.  I was recently accused by a "friend" of refusing to teach for her store but then teaching at someone else's and that wasn't the damn case at all.  I didn't get to explain, I didn't get to say it was just the occasional one when they, who are FRIENDS of mine got stuck.  The bit that makes me saddest is that I upset her without even meaning to.  It's that bullshit side of the scrapbooking industry that has now burned me one too many times now, I'm over it.  I love sharing what I know but the politics behind it really are crap so I'm stepping out of it completely.  I'll still scrap, but just for me.  Sick of the shit that goes on between women who are meant to be supporting each other.  I don't need that "you did this" bullshit.  Ugh....luckily the last shop I taught for have the same attitude as me and don't cause me any issue but I still want out...

My focus now is on my family, my babies who are growing way too fast and make me prouder and prouder each and every day. They also make me want to knock their heads together at some stage each and every day but that's motherhood right?  My Alex got into an advanced curriculum program for high school next year (yes WTF? High School) and Maddy has some seriously awesome Maths and Reading skills.  I'm so lucky.  Mind you they've had an endless line of cold after virus after bug and seem to be home ALL the flipping time :(  I've just started them on Echinacea, Anti-biotics, pro-biotics, vitamins, fruit etc you name it, it's time they get well.  It'd probably help if parent's stopped sending their sick kids to school spreading germs but that is another whole gripey post...

I'm focussing on getting well myself and trying to make amends for the dumb things I've done during my breakdown.  Bills are caught up, upcoming wedding shoots are sorted, editing all almost finished and I'm booking LOTS of weddings for next season.  BRING IT ON!  I love it!

If you read this far and stayed with me thanks.  If you're empathetic towards me, quadruple thanks.  If you're judging me because I have an emotional illness, kindly leave and may the door knock you on the way out.

So here's to my recovery and may my blog be regularly updated!  Cheers!

Almost at the surface...

If you've been a reader of my blog over the last five years, you'll know I have NEVER not posted for this long. I'm not dead, just busy. Really busy being wife and mumma, aunt, sister, friend, plus working.

Working like a mad woman and loving pretty much every minute of it. Im full time photographing PLUS I have a new job too. The blog here is due for a makeover as well but it's not been a priority over brides, babies and bellies. It's also a busy time commercially with businesses I shoot for designing annual reports and calendars and stuff.

I will be back. Soon.

yabbering between yawns...

Ah can you hear that?  Yes, it's silence, the silence of my "everyone-is-sleeping home" Hooray!!

I've been having a few "moments" tonight, you know the kind, the IF-ONE-MORE-PERSON-WANTS-A-PIECE-OF-ME-I-MAY-SPONTANEOUSLY-COMBUST kind of moments, the type that feels like you're being pecked to death a wee bit at a time, slowly, painfully until you give in a collapse in a heap - urgh!  Okay I may be exaggerating a little but honestly grrr...

I often wish I could grow really enormously tall and scream very loudly lording it over who or what is failing to recognise that they're really annoying me.  Actually I'd be somewhat satisfied with an Incredible Hulk type transformation also but really now I'm just babbling and you really probably don't need to read that.

So anyway, I've been busy of late.  Busy in both my personal life and work life.

Some good, some not so good but meh, that's life isn't it?  I have been somewhat overwhelmed by some of the stuff that's been going on but feeling quite philosophical about it all.  Sort of.  Anyone who knows me well knows I am a sap and I wear my heart on my sleeve.  I stupidly trust people and I let things they say get to me.  I hate that.  But the opposite of being too soft doesn't appeal to me either - bah!

Balancing out the gobsmacking ugliness of interhuman behaviour has been some amazing client experiences.  I've been meeting LOTS of wedding couples and seeing the stars in their eyes as they plan their gorgeous nuptuals is something I will never get tired of.  Even more exciting is the venues I know I'll be visiting over the next few months - bliss...

I've also been shooting quite a few delicious subjects, including these adorable guys and their lucky lucky baby-to-be!  This bubba is going to enter the most amazing family, I can tell already and looking at it's gene pool already, it's going to be one spunky bubba!

It was a total pleasure to photograph these guys on what was possibly the most miserable weather day of the year - not that you can tell :)

Next up was a fabulous farm-inspired shoot of another spunky couple out in the country.  I love where I live, green hills and the smell of cow manure always reminds me of my childhood and this place had all that and more.  A DIVINE location, lush green paddocks surrounded by native bushland, puppies, calves, cows, chooks and baby lambs - awwww and mud glorious mud!

They made so many amazing images it was really hard to narrow it down to even these.  Aren't they gorgeous??

Also this last week on another miserably cold wet and windy day was this yummy Mummy Beth, her spunkalicious Kiwi and divine cherub Charli.  I'm still working on their session but here's one of Beth.  Have you seen a more AMAZING 37 week pregnant woman?

More of this session VERY soon!

I've also done photo shoots for a brochure and have events and engagement sessions this weekend!

In leisure news, the lovely Suz arranged a fabulous night for her and I seeing The Eels live in concert!  I had no idea who they were until Suz and I spent a weekend locked away in a country cabin trying desperately to catch up on our scrapping commitments and there was no stereo in the cabin.  We ended up with Suz's limited playlist from her laptop and the odd few cds that were kicking around in my car.  Lucky for us we have similar taste because I think we heard each song about 127 times each.  It wasn't bad though because I realised that I love the Eels and have done ever since.  And live, they were AMAZING!

And....unfortunately, just like The Pixies concert we went to some nasty cow had to get all pushy and rude.  Had I blogged this closer to the event, it would have been VERY nasty.  A woman pushed into Suz's spot beside me and I jokingly said that she might get squished when Suz comes back as she'd be standing with me.  Grr she went nuts about not being able to see etc.  We would have helped her out but no, when Suz got back she started going on about people being childish etc.  We were both gobsmacked, she was clearly just some sour trouble-making mole.  There I said it, the epitome of 80s bogan teenage girl.  Mole.  Best bitch-word ever.  Mole mole mole, yes lady *cough* you are a nasty mole.  Right.  That feels better.

It took me all of my effort not to cause a repeat of the TOO-CROWDED-TO-MOVE  bitch-fight of 1993 when a nasty sourpuss in a crowd called my sister a bulldozer when she was pushed from behind.   Everyone was pushing it was crazy and some cow said it loud and clear and I said, "I beg your pardon, who DO you think you are?" or something like that and I continued to tell her how rude she was and that everyone was stuck in the crowd and she should keep her nasty opinions inside her forked-tongue-containing mouth. Or something polite like that.  And then it got awkward because after my outburst right back at sourpuss I couldn't storm off in a huff.  We just had to stand there eyeing each other off.  Eek...

The "woman" at The Eels concert may very well have even been the same one.  Anyway, the man she was with came and took her away.  I amused myself with thoughts of him shaking his head at her and saying what an embarrassment she was but I imagine it wasn't that way.  I like my made-up her being scorned for ugly behaviour better.  She was the only ass in this crowd that we came across though...

It was a pretty ace crowd full of gorgeous outfits and funny hats.

My hubby Nathan has been in hospital for part of this week having surgery and I thought it would be nothing, it has ended up being more of an upheaval than I anticipated.  I was SO worried about him when I thought I wouldn't be and to our kids' credit they both patiently waited for him to come out of surgery despite the fact that the hospital was boring and they were hungry.  They insisted on waiting and Nathan said as he came out of anaesthetic, the first thing he remembers is seeing us waiting for him.  That was important to me and it happened.  Happily.  Both kids coped really well and managed to moan and fight as much as they usually do so all around it's been an okay experience.

Charming isn't he?

I have been quite drained emotionally since joining in on the Road Trauma Awareness Seminars as a volunteer, but I'm still pleased I did it.  It's just taken a bit out of me and I went to dinner the other night to sort out the next round with the organisers, and kind of debrief I guess but the circumstances ended up being awful and it's made me question WHY things happen the way they do.  It doesn't matter how much I work to block certain elements from my past they still come back to purtrify a fabulous existence from time to time.  Why is that? Why is it that some negativity and ugliness can't just keep to itself?

So when I feel a bit icky I escape into my sketch pads and draw.  I've been working on this but it's not finished yet, excuse my phone photo...

I hope to finish it some time over the weekend.  Maybe.

I'd love to show you wnat else I've been creating but i can't yet.  Some has been magazine commissioned and some for Aussie Scrap Source, so you'll just have to wait I'm afraid! =o)

Starting next month I'm also returning to teaching, starting at Fat Cats Scrappin' in Warragul.  You know it's amazing that the two girls that run the shop were my students two years ago and now they've just gone OFF and have a gorgeous shop and much enthusiasm, it's been great to watch!  More info on that soon.  I just picked up the stuff to make a sample and I'm busting to get started!

Right, well, I have a brand new lambswool electric blanket on my bed tonight and can't wait to try it out.  It's also the first night I get to sleep with my hubby since Tuesday and I intend to make the most of all that heat so I'd best get off this computer chair and off to bed. Night!!

flat but still fun

I've been in a real pip of a mood this week.  Bah!  I'm starting to think maybe I have a mild case of Seasonal Affective Disorder I'm just feeling so FLAT and unmotivated. Dramatic aren't I? It could be true though; I do like Winter but I find staying inside all of the time and gloomy dark light just sucks my personal mojo.  I just want to hibernate. Someone I once knew told me they thought I was solar-powered.  I think it might be true.

Photo jobs this week are slow, since I've cut back on my scrapbooking it's slow.  Mind you I have stuff due, I just can't get motivated to complete it.  And that's JUST NOT ME!  Grrr....I am one of the most self-motivated people I know.  I NEVER get bored but this week I've been moping around like a pathetic sooky la-la.  It's crazy!

Normally I'd use the slower pace to catch up on my ironing, to clean out cupboards and see friends I've been missing, but nup.  I also have this stupid feeling of guilt that Nathan is AT work and I am not.  He pointed out to me that I'm often working when he's not but I can't get my head around that.  Less work also means less money and none of us enjoy that! It makes it harder for me to do stuff that I don't feel is necessarily as productive as I could be.

It's okay though, I have some new ideas, I've been sewing madly and I've been doing all the cooking. I can't help but hope that whatever is bugging me is easily shaken as soon as possible because nothing irks me like time wasting!.

Before this sooky la-la-ness, I caught up with some old friends that I went to school with.  We had dinner and drinks and it ended up being a big night.  It's no secret that I like to have a few drinks when I go out.  Don't think I've quite "lost it" yet but going out to all of our old haunts made me feel OLD!  Age doesn't really bother me though so I didn't let it bother me. I was astounded at how tight security is now and how um..crappy the local pub scene still is - lol.  I drank a lot, I had a ball, I wouldn't change a thing! Cocktails, wine, Jagerbombs, Vodka, it's all good, however I think my body is glad I don't do it very often :)

The girls dragged me out of the second pub at about 2.30am.  PIKERS!  They had the nerve (lol) to call me the Energizer Bunny, due to my enthusiasm to get up and go, and the most lovely thing is that in almost 20 years, none of us have really changed all that much. Raelene was my BFF in High School and even though we live in the same town, we hardly ever catch up.  The beautiful thing is that we don't need to, to still have a good time.  To me it was like we've always hung out and that is true friendship, where things don't change when you haven't seen each other for a while.  That photo of us above is almost an accidental copy of ones taken of us in our teens :D

Phew I think just writing this nonsense down has already lifted some of my la-la-ness!

Thanks for visiting!

officially back to normal (sort of)

Into February already, kids are back at school and I'm trying to find my way into the normal everyday.

I haven't found my way yet and the task of writing myself a list is proving overwhelming - lol..I hate being bored and there's no chance of that so there's no complaints here.

I spent a fair bit of the holidays catching up on my client editing and I'm in the process of building a new updated website.  I love how it looks so far but time is not on my side, I have to just do little bits here and there!

I wanted to share some scrapping that I don't think I've put on here yet, firstly January kits for Budget Scrapbooking.  I did the "Pages" kit this month using yummo Crate Paper.

Aussie Scrap Source Grungepaper project -

Anna Griffin -

7 Gypsies -

 
And I did some sewing....

The dress was made from pre-shirred fabric from Spotlight and the skirt is a "lazy days skirt" using the pattern which can be found here. Have a look on Mel's blog for Lazy Days Skirt inspiration.

Then of course I made chairbags from my Miss Moo and my niece Lilly.  The night before school went back - eek!

Lilly was easy, she just wanted something pink with fairies and she adored the rick rack on Maddy's Lazy Days skirt so I added some and made her this -

My Divine Miss M however was not so simple.  She was very specific with what she would like on her chairbag this year.  She wanted to pick the fabric - cool it was spots, I love spots.

It had to have a monkey sewn onto it, not any monkey but a cute monkey with a tree where it is hanging upside down by it's tail holding a cute sign that says "Maddy" on it.  She even made me little sketches sort of and I was to and from from my sketch book seeking approval from the child that said, "I know you can make it Mum because you can make anything." And with an ego-feed and expectation like that I was determined not to let her down.

The child tearing up the hallway to scream at me in bed that there was a monkey on her chairbag and how wonderful it was was worth it all. :)  She proudly whipped it out of her school bag on day one of term to show everyone!

 I have lots of other stuff I could blog but I give up trying to catch up, rather I will just try to keep up! I will leave this post with some recent client pic faves - seeya! :)

I could keep going with this wedding, honestly they were amazing people, but I'll stop and save it all for my website!!

and we're off....

...and almost 2 weeks into 2010 already.  Crikey!  Haven't done anything too spectacular this year really.  So far. I have plans.  Sort of.  But first I'm just trying to rejuvenate myself or something.  I had planned to do nothing for the first few weeks of January but I shot the most amazing wedding the day after Boxing Day and the couple were so gorgeous, enthusiastic and excited that I just want to give them their images.  NOW! 

But they're taking me forever to edit. Mainly because there are so many amazing images and they were so damn photogenic that they were easy to get good photos of.  And....they said they want me to go to town being creative on their images and I can't help it, I'm having a ball. It's also the perfect excuse to veg during this ridiculous heatwave. Here's a few faves so far.  I will show more when they're done..

Aren't these boys handsome eh?  They've got a cool thing going on in that accidental pic...

And the couple, far out, he looked like he'd won the lottery all day with a grin from ear to ear and Mary the bride.  What can I say?  She has THE most contagious and joyous personality of anyone I think I've ever met.  She is one of those people that are just beautiful to be in the presence of and she was the most amazing bride!  Love this...

I've done a few weddings in the last month or so, it's a popular time of year...

 

These guys were maybe the most relaxed wedding couple ever.  I have known the bride for as long as I can remember, we grew up together, our Mums were friends, and they did things their way and it was perfect.  Scanning the crowd during the celebrations, there were no bored-looking faces just people smiling and having fun everywhere!

I am starting to develop an interest in classic cars since I seem to be photographing them so much lately.  I'm LOVING them, the shine, the smoothness, the finish - all very sexy - lol...

 

But I also have an appreciation for the big vehicles too!

These trucks were for this wedding renewal that was actually as gorgeous as a wedding anyway.  The couple had been married for ten years and she still looked divine in her original dress!

 

I spent most of December just working, doing lots of commercial work, weddings and family sessions for people for Christmas.  My Miss Moo had her school concert and sang "Puff The Magic Dragon".  She insisted on wearing the pretty dress, little white Mary Jane heels and her reindeer antlers.  She was the cutest reindeer ever!

Of course Mr A, who was also at the school barbecue with his class was TOO cool for such nonsense and just hung out with his friends...

I was so proud of Maddy at the concert.  She was itching to show me her contribution to the school's art show that year.  They have a little exhibition and we get to "oo" and "ahh" over the artworks.  I LOVE that! Anyway Maddy had drawn the "Weeping Woman" by Picasso. 

She was so proud of the fact that she'd seen the REAL Weeping Woman as she is pictured there late 2008.  Sometimes she gets bored by art galleries (fair enough too) but it pleased my maternal ego that perhaps she took in more that day than I realised :)

Our Christmas was pretty low-key.  For one thing we were SO busy leading up to it.  I hardly took any photos which I think I might regret come 2010 scrapping projects but I'll worry about that later.  I was SO exhausted I felt like all I did was sleep for the days of Christmas.  We just had a barbie here, the kids were relaxed, played with their cousins, too easy!

I was pretty impressed that Nathan loved his present from me.  Well one of them.  How cool is this t-shirt, like really?

And we had an early Christmas dinner at Mum's place...two nurses and a bit of dysfunction mean shuffling dates around sometimes...

We were being a bit lazy when it came to New Year's Eve.  We weren't really going to do anything until a friend suggested they come for dinner and drinks and it sounded fab.  I think I actually wanted to DO something but was too lazy to organise it. Or something.  We ended up having the best night as more people joined us and we had a mini-party in the backyard.  It looked a bit like this..

It was SO hot and the crazy downpour and storm was a welcome relief later on!

A few days later I had the absolute pleasure of seeing Jimmy Barnes in concert - yay!  The ticket was one of the best birthday pressies I ever received from my friend Bobbie.  Shannon Noll and Adam Brand performed too but I was there mainly for Barnesy and I can say I'm STILL on a high from it.  Bobbie and I were lucky enough to be given the front spots once Jimmy Barnes was on stage.  Wow!

 

And even though this pic is blurry I love it because those smiles are of two gals who just scored the front row, PLUS this chick has been one of my besties for 15 years when we met working on the same building site!

Shannon Noll was good too despite the electricity going off in the middle of his show - lol...

 

You can see these photos a bit larger on my Facebook page  I had THE best time! My ears were ringing for days and I got to squeal like a teenager!  I even got a t-shirt!

On Friday it was my birthday.  Thirty-six.  Yep 36.  THIRTY-SIX. I made it to thirty-six - WOOHOO!!!!  Geez I love birthdays.  Every year is a blessing no matter how bad it is.  I'm grateful I'm still here so yay!

I spent a very quiet day avoiding the heat with the kids.  They gave me a yummy vintage-y photo frame that I had not-so-subtly pointed out to them at Christmas!  Love it!  They got together and planned nice things they'd do for me like putting their washing out and looking after me.  It was SO cute :) 

I had dinner and drinks with friends that night, at home in the backyard cloud-watching.  Bliss.

I have other stuff to blog, scrapbooking, holidays and stuff but to be honest this post has exhausted me - lol...I'm trying to get up-to-date and almost there.

3 weeks or so...

I shouldn't be sitting here right now but I'm biting the bullet and blogging before a whole month gets away from me!

Like everyone else I know my life lately (always) has been hectic and a bit chaotic.  I often wonder when things might slow down and if they do, will I like it?  Probably not.

A few weeks ago, Suz and I realised that we were both drowning in commitments and like most mums of youngish kids, we were (are)  hardly ever afforded enough uninterrupted time to catch up with work so we headed out towards the mountains and the quiet and rented a little holiday cabin for a weekend.  The view of the snow on Mt Baw Baw was gorgeous and the whole place was lovely.

 

The weather had been cold and wet, yet the one weekend we're stuck inside working, the sun came out and the weather was glorious...

 

Mind you, I got quite a bit of work done and could sleep when I wanted, eat when I wanted and didn't have to pick up after anyone but me.  I'd love to say it was lovely and relaxing but it was very much trying to get as much work done in as little time as possible.  Lovely to do it all without distraction though...

 

I managed to not only complete this kit for our Budget Scrapbooking October Christmas Card kit release -

 

but I finished off the October Quickutz kit too!

 

I managed FIFTEEN cards from our $20 card kit - I was stoked!  If you're interested in buying them, you'll find them on our site here

And Suz's Pages kit too!

Speaking of scrapbooking and paper stuff, you've all seen this which is in Scrapbook Creations this month - 

 

Well, I also did the Scrapping For Teens article this month.  Here's my contribution - 

 

A CD case and a little cover for a gift card.  AND thanks to a very generous teen, this little book from passport pics.  I put the call out on Facebook that I needed teen pics and her and her Mum chased up and scanned all the pics I needed. SO helpful!

And.....here is a little book I made for Aussie Scrap Source using lots and lots of Glimmermist.  It was actually to showcase a few different uses of bobbly trims (they're so yummy)

 

 

For such a little project I'm telling you it felt like it took me forever to complete it!  I'm SO slow...

I've been more than busy with photography jobs lately and LOVING it!  I've had some of THE coolest jobs ever.  Some have been commercial jobs so I can't show them yet but others I can share away.  Like this one, a current fave because it was SO fun!!!

 

Aren't they hotties?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Three sisters who did this just because they wanted too.  Cool huh?  AND they thought they had TWO hot rods coming from a friend.  We ended up with SIX gorgeous amazing old cars including a Mustang from a random stranger who saw what we were doing and offered her car to us for photos.  People were stopping us and saying more women should do it.  It was empowering for all of us and I've never really been "into" cars but the red one above was just SO beautiful it took my breath away. I have literally hundreds of great pics to sift through and having a ball doing so.  You can see more of them here

Here's a few more of the G family.  I loved looking at these gorgeous cherubs, they're so adorable..

 

 

 

 

And....I had a belly in the bush shoot too!

 

Lots more of those on the way :)  It was a crazy adventure getting there.  I wish I made more time to blog so I'd get it all down!

For now though I'm sure I've annoyed everyone enough with this giant photo-fest.

Back to editing and scrapping for me, thanks for stopping by!

Nic :)

I'm not having a crisis.....honest....

...but I got this done last week....

The bar piercing that is - known as a 'scaffold' or an 'industrial'.  I already had the high ring piercing and the bar goes either side of it.  I know what you want to ask,"Did it hurt?" and the answer is, "Hell yes!"  It was a needle piercing so a cut to fit the bar.  It was worse after a couple of days  - OUCH - but today I've been able to lay on it.  I LOVE it and before you think I am mindlessly insane, I'd been thinking about it for ages and decided to just do it.  I love piercings and it's there because I feel like I'm going through some huge changes emotionally, spiritually and philosophically and basically it's there to remind me of what I've been through, to listen instead of speak, and to not grow OLD! It's a reminder that although our bodies age and we wisen and mature, we shouldn't forget the lessons of our youth - and that's the main reasoning!

So I've been busy busy as usual, have my finger in a few pies right now, one of them being a little job I'm doing in a soon-to-be-opened cafe/art gallery here.  I've been soooooo insatiably lucky to cross paths with artist-extra-ordinnaire Kimbaross.  To cut a long-ish story short, I finally met him in person last weekend and have secured some of his DIVINE pieces for display and sale in the gallery.  Here's a couple I have here that I do NOT want to part with.  Ever.

 

I've totally stolen these pics from his site (thanks K - lol) and will have a new section at www.nicolefinlayson.com where you will be able to buy the artworks I have in the gallery online if you'd like to.  If you're interested in either of these pieces, please contact me via the email link.  If you just want to drool over his amazing portfolio check out his work here. AND if you don't want to buy these pieces you can buy prints of the pieces at the same site AND he is generously donating all profits to bushfire charities.  Awesome eh???

Speaking of all things arty, I feel a bit inferior to post this right after that creative genius BUT I finally got a chance to scribble and here's this week's effort -

A quick charcoal on canvas paper.  Man I LOVE charcoal. Anyway it's title "Resignation".  You know when you fight the daily fight and you just give up?  Well that's what I was thinking here...

I have a sketch book full of ideas for art pieces, just life gets in the way sometimes...

At least I still get to scrap - here's the last few pieces I've done for Aussie Scrap Source

Isn't that Cosmo Cricket "Everafter" range totally DIVINE!!!??  I did a layout with it today as well but can't share quite yet :)

I spent last weekend with my favourite scrappy girlfriends making pages for Sarah's Memory Gifts appeal,a  crop organised by Cindy.  We made HEAPS of pages and had a FABULOUS night with drinks, pizza and laughs all around and lucky for me the lovely Suz let me crash at her house for the night. (Actually i should say thankyou to phoebe since it was her gorgeous pink room that I got to sleep in again :) -thanks Phoebe)

Here's a few pics stolen from Cindy's blog of us feeling festive...

 

He he heeee!!!

I've been very busy with photo bookings as well this month which is SO fantastic, I'm LOVING every second still!  I have a couple of exciting things in the pipeline so I'll be busy for quite some time I reckon.

Before I go I want to share with you some more of the 10th Anniversary photos of Tanya and Michael - they were SO adorable.

 

 

 

 

 

Hotties aren't they?

I have some other stuff I'd love to share but honestly I've been sitting here for SO long, I really need to do something more constructive.  Bye for now :)

Searching for my spark....

I taught my last class for a while at Simply Said last weekend - a mixed media canvas and everyone did brilliantly - all SO different.  These are mine - you've seen them on here before -

Using similar techniques, the girls all had a ball with Glimmermist and all sorts of yummy crafty goodness!

They were all so clever! Don't these look yummy? Polished Pigments sitting on the table.

And here's my layouts from Aussie Scrap Source for this week just gone!

Paper Loft -

Junkitz Fabric Swatches :) Can't believe I didn't know about these earlier, I'm in love ;)

And finally Paper Trunk - most of the product on this page was from CHA, not here yet, but soon!!!

I had two photoshoots the weekend just gone, on Saturday AND Sunday and I am completely, totally LOVING every moment of it.  Mind you, I have around 1000 photos to edit and sort but that's perfectly okay with me!

And I've been doing some stuff that I've been meaning to for ages like "refashion" a jumper I found in an op-shop into a bag that would hold my sketch book and stuff.  Anyone who knows me well knows I love stripes - particularly black and red or black and grey - I love grey, I love it's ability to pick up any colour it's with and it's neutral-ness (yes it's a word on my blog ).  I had to line it with my favourite red fabric with white polka dots!

I took it to the city with me last week on the big search for my spark, my mojo, my joy for life and creativity and while I can't say I found it exactly, I'm certainly re-motivated.  I've been editing photos from my day trip all night and now I'm too tired to blog them - lol!  Will do another day :)

I've also been sewing head bands, mainly just for Maddy and I and my neice.

You can find the pattern for this headband here

Even if you don't make the headband, check out the site -yum! :)

Okay I was going to add heaps more but it's near midnight, I need to go to bed :)